Laura Gillmore Zimmerman (Daughter)
Entered
July 25, 2016
from Winnipeg
Eulogy
I am going to talk about three important things today. Our mom’s husband, our dad and grandfather’s love of family, Bing Gillmore’s larger than life personality, and if there is time, a little bit about his working life. These three parts of his life truly made the man, a man we loved so long, and so fiercely. Bing was many things to many people – husband, son, brother, cousin, DAD, father-in-law, grandfather, great-grandfather, brother-in-law, uncle, friend, neighbor, community activist, colleague, acquaintance. He was loved, respected, and admired, and to us, very, very special. And importantly, in all of the many messages of condolence we have received this week, almost everyone who knew Bing described him as one of a kind, a teller of stories, a “real character.” This does not surprise us.
Our dad, our mom’s husband, was before there were any of us, a boy and a young man from Pickardville, Alberta. This always mattered to Dad; his place in a family of three children, born on the prairie in 1923 to “come from away” parents from Pictou County and Bridgewater, Nova Scotia. He adored his parents, raised by a father who ran the grain elevator and then the Hardware Store, and a mother who owned and operated the General Store. Bing’s stories of growing up in Pickardville are for us, legendary, always shared to teach or to entertain, and clearly stories that shaped and defined him as a person. As kids growing up, and I think as grandkids growing up, it was always crystal clear how much Bing loved and respected his mom and dad, the town and townspeople of Pickardville, and how much he valued family. The Gillmores of Alberta were hardworking, kind, and respectful people. And that’s how our dad’s story began.
In 1954, Ingram Burhoe Gillmore, a man from the west, met, fell in love with, and married a girl from Clarkson, Ontario - Jean Laura Mills. Our mom will tell you that Bing was the love of her life – as she was his – a love story that extended over 62 years, almost to the day. A story we love? Jean and Bing met on a blind date on the May 24th week-end, announced their engagement to Garfield and Laura, Jean’s parents, on July 19th, and were married on December 4th of the same year. Mom shares that knowing that theirs was a whirlwind romance, Bing purposefully chose July 19th because it was our grandpa’s birthday and he would be in a good mood to say yes…
And then came Rinn, Jane, Laura, Sheryl, and John. We feel we were the luckiest of children being born to Bing and Jean. Our dad loved us with a steadfast, under the surface, genuine and lasting love. He taught us through example, through story, and sometimes through direct voice messaging… In a nutshell, growing up, our dad taught us:
• that manners mattered,
• that we should always be considerate of others, and especially of their feelings,
• the importance of a firm handshake and looking people in the eye,
• that while some people treat strangers more politely than their family, it would be the other way around in our family; that we were to treat each other with kindness, caring, and respect, and he held us to that,
• that we could set out to do anything we put our minds to,
• our multiplication tables
• to interest ourselves in the world around us,
• that our voices, and our actions, mattered. Our dad believed in and encouraged us to participate in conversations about important things.
Importantly this week, Rinn reminded me that Dad was smiling in almost every picture we have of him, of what a good listener Dad was, and how he never turned down an invitation. He was a social being, our father… Jane reminded me that we always knew how much our dad loved us, and that he was a dad raised by a working mother; that we watched him help clear the table, make the pancakes, darn the socks, do some laundry, and that the influence of this has carried through to all of our families. Sheryl’s message? How generous Dad was with his time, his listening, and as he got older, his wallet. John reminded me about Dad’s love of sharing sporting events with us, and how special the times were at Leafs, Jets, and Blue Bomber games.
Along with all of this, and so much more, Bing’s five kids will certainly remember Saturday Candy Days at the local Toronto smoke shop, his cigar, that when he was home it was his couch, to fold a newspaper so that it was in its original form ready for the next person, and his love of photography. We are grateful for all of the pictures.
At the end of Dad’s life it is also important to share a few words about his working life. Our Dad loved working. He loved being an electrical engineer from the University of Alberta, his early career with a few different electrical companies, and most especially his longtime career with Westinghouse Canada and Westco. Dad loved being around people, getting the work done, leading a team, solving a problem. It seems to us that in the workplace he led and taught like he did with us, “one conversation at a time”. We found a binder of over one hundred retirement good wishes this week, and to a person, each person wrote of how happy they were to have known Bing, how much of a positive influence he was on their life. They wrote of how committed he was to providing opportunities for them to shine, and then shine some more. This is a very nice work legacy to leave behind.
For such a loved husband, father, and grandfather, Robert Raines, writer, gets the last words:
Thank-you for parents and grandparents
Whose love was the climate of our childhood
Who fed us, and forgave us day by day
Who hoped for us
Who taught us to have confidence in the world,
and in ourselves
So that our days are fruitful and our hearts thankful.
(Raines, 1976, p.67)
We are thankful and so very grateful for the life of a man who signed himself I. B. G.
