My Dad
We just celebrated my dad’s 100th birthday last month and every family member was there. We all got a chance to share and chat with him and he really enjoyed himself. Now dad was never an adventurer or a secret agent type, but he was known by many names.
His real name was Frank, but his alias was Franz, Papa, Dad, Nannu and recently Hannini (sweet heart in Maltese). And when he was born in 1917 it seemed to be a Maltese tradition to give newborns as many middle names as possible. Of the 20 or so he was given, the one that stood out to me was Publius. Publius? I found out later it was a biblical name. Publius was "the chief man of the island" of Malta (Acts 28:7), who courteously entertained Paul and his shipwrecked companions for three days. Interesting, because my dad was always very welcoming.
My Dad had many hobbies and interests and he enjoyed a simple and uncomplicated life. In fact one could compare him to a hobbit.
J.R.R. Tolken’s literary masterpiece ‘The Lord of the Rings’, is the biggest selling book, second only to the Bible. My dad never read about Hobbits, he just simply was one. Not in every trait, but in most. Let me share some of the similar aspects of these mythical peace-loving creatures as summarised by a few quotes from Tolkien.
“In fact it has been remarked by some, that Hobbit’s only real passion is for food. A rather unfair observation, as Hobbits have also developed a keen interest in the brewing of ales”. (For years, dad would make his own wine from his own concord grapes in the backyard. He would also splice in different grape varieties as well.)
“But where our hearts truly lie is in peace and quiet, and good tilled earth, for all hobbits share a love for things that grow”. (Dad was the original organic gardener. Before I knew anything about organic cultivation, dad was composting, and avoiding pesticides. As a teen I found his methods strange, especially when pesticides were so readily available and effective. Now I using boiling water and vinegar as pest control myself.)
“And yes no doubt to others our hobbit ways seem quaint, but it has brought home to me, it is no bad thing to celebrate a simple life.”
My dad enjoyed a simple, uncomplicated, worry-free, wonderful life. To a great degree that was because my mom took care of all the details and planning. :)
Dad did not teach me so much by instruction, but by example. FOR example, at age 6 or 7, my sister Val and I, the older siblings, would be quite active in causing mischief. One time we were caught stealing cookies or poking the icing on a cake or something. All we heard was mom saying, Papa is going to get ‘IL, Chunturine’. Which when translated in English would mean, the belt of unbearable pain.
So Val and I did what most guilty children would do, slide under the closest bed like a couple of Norwegian seals. My dad proceeded to slap the mattress with the belt over and over. I told my sister Val to ‘pretend scream’ with me, so mom and dad would think slapping the mattress instead of our bottoms would be a most effective method of discipline. Well it worked, and I do not recall ever getting a real spanking. We actually ended up not bad kids after all. I was able to pass that non-violent approach to my girls, who turned out extraordinarily well. I would threaten 'not playing with them anymore' unless they clean their room for example.
Dad’s passion’s for most of his life was gardening. Growing and cultivating his own fruits and vegetables, raising rabbits. He would tinker in the basement to make a rabbit cage or a trellis, or to put a new wooden handle on a broken hammer or screwdriver. And he always enjoyed watching the BBC and international news.
My parents would also go to church every Sunday. And every night pray for us as they did the rosary.
As a kid I would hear them repeating “or-op-u-nobis” and I knew they were praying. It could have been Latin, Greek, Hebrew, Maltese or Aramaic, but I knew they were praying for us.
Dad will leave behind his devoted wife and lifelong companion, whom he recently celebrated a diamond anniversary with. 60 years of marriage is quite a rare achievement indeed. He will leave behind his oldest son who admired him, respected him and incorporated so much of his behaviour. A daughter who loved him beyond words. And his youngest son who also loved respected, and admired him, and often did reno projects for their comfort. He was also cherished by all his grand-kids, whose memory of him is nothing but pleasant.
We did not have much growing up, but we had the security of loving parents, so you could say we had everything.
Although my dad did not need pain killers before he passed, he was in an uncomfortable state. And all the hobbies he enjoyed were a thing of the past. My greatest joy and delight is to know that my dad is now gently and safely in the arms of the one he has been praying to all these years. And that Jesus is now cherishing my dad more than any of us ever could.
